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THREE STOOGES: “PIES AND GUYS” (1958)

SUMMARY:       RUNNING TIME: 16:00 Min. (Black & White)

Directed and produced by Jules White off his brother Jack White’s script, this mid-1958 Stooges comedy co-starring Joe Besser is literally a scene-for-scene knock-off of an earlier remake. 

Here’s the quick backstory: reworking their 1935 Pygmalion-inspired Hoi Polloi, Curly Howard’s last Stooges caper was 1947’s Half-Wit’s Holiday (also directed by Jules White).  Hence, White’s Besser footage filmed for Pies and Guys is mostly tacked on the front end, as new actors replace ‘Quackenbush,’ ‘Lulu,’ & ‘Sedlitz.’  It isn’t clear if Emil Sitka’s Half-Wits footage was recycled, or if he simply re-filmed his role as the butler.    

Snooty rival professors Quackenbush and Sedlitz make a financial wager whether or not Quackenbush can reform dim-witted plumbers Larry, Moe, & Joe into refined gentlemen.  With support from his glamorous blonde assistant, Lulu, Quackenbush tutors the less-than-astute Stooges on mathematics, reading, and dignified table manners, etc. 

A big society party is the climax where the Stooges must prove their newfound sophistication to their fellow guests.  Yet, a melee ensues once kleptomaniac Joe and his fellow Stooges revert to their instinctive pie-throwing mayhem. 

Moe: Moe Howard

Larry: Larry Fine

Joe: Joe Besser

Professor Quackenbush: Milton Frome

Miss Lulu: Greta Thyssen

Sappington: Emil Sitka

Professor Sedlitz: Gene Roth

Mrs. Smythe-Smythe: Symona Boniface

Mrs. Gotrocks: Helen Dickson

Countess Shpritzvasser: Harriette Tarler

Party Guests: Judy Malcolm, Victor Travers, Wanda Perry, Barbara Slater, Al Thompson, Johnny Kascier, & Mary Forbes

Additional Party Guests: Uncredited.

Notes: Besser takes a pie to the face early in the finale and then inexplicably isn’t seen again.  It’s clear that this episode’s vintage ‘Larry & Moe’ pie-throwing party has been lifted from elsewhere – in this instance, 1947′ s Half-Wit’s Holiday

Intentionally or not, Frome & Roth tower over the Stooges, as if Moe, Larry, & Joe, by comparison, are practically dwarves. 

Lastly, here’s a bit of Stooges trivia: Moe’s wife, Helen, had first suggested (or even written a draft of) a Stooges adaptation of Pygmalion, which ended up as 1935’s Hoi Polloi.  

REVIEW:

If the dull new footage is evidence, Pies and Guys is merely a cheap contractual obligation. For instance, virtually all of this Besser version’s finale is directly lifted as archived footage from Half-Wit’s Holiday. Symona Boniface’s brief presence is especially awkward, considering she had passed away in 1950.

More so, aside from Larry & Moe’s amusing under-the-table hand-holding gag (also reenacted from Half-Wit’s), the Besser-era footage indicates a tired cast merely going through the motions.  As for Besser, given his lack of on-screen chemistry with Moe & Larry, the less said of his contributions the better.      

The sole incentive for enduring Pies and Guys is fast-forwarding to the hilarious Larry-and-Moe pie-tossing festival – Larry: “You forgot to duck (hah, hah) — (seconds later) Moe: “So did you!”.  Considering the tragic reason for this two-Stooge finish was Curly’s career-ending stroke during the filming of Half-Wit’s Holiday, their vintage teamwork recycled twelve years later still packs some comedy dynamite.

To bleakly summarize how lazy and budget-stingy Columbia Pictures had become, this short abruptly ends as the pie fight starts winding down.  White doesn’t even bother tacking on a new finish, even just to convey that Besser was still in the ‘room.’  Watching the politically incorrect Hoi Polloi and/or the gooey finish to Half-Wit’s Holiday obviously makes far more sense. 

BRIAN’S ODD MOON RATING:             2 Stars

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BDC
October 2020